Poor William's Almanack and Journal
Contact and Feedback
About William

Rightspeak Glossary

Privacy Statement
Search this site

Ben Franklin's bifocals Saturday, August 13, 2011

Activist Lucy Stone    Activist Lucy Stone in 1847
[1818 - Lucy Stone, abolitionist, suffragist, born in West Brookfield, Massachusetts]

Sharpshooter Annie Oakley    Frontierswoman Annie Oakley    Sharpshooter Annie Oakley    Sharpshooter Annie Oakley
[1860 - Annie Oakley (Phoebe Ann Mosey), sharpshooter, frontierswoman, born in Drake County, Ohio]

Actor Bert Lahr    Bert Lahr as the Cowardly Lion    Bert Lahr as the Cowardly Lion
[1895 - Bert Lahr (Irving Lahrheim), actor, born in New York City]

Director Alfred Hitchcock    Director Alfred Hitchcock
[1899 - Alfred Joseph Hitchcock, director, born in London, England]

Actor Regis Toomey
[1902 - Regis Toomey, actor, born
in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania]

Actor Gene Raymond    Actor Gene Raymond
[1908 - Gene Raymond (Raymond Guion), actor, born in New York City]

Golfing Great Bantam Ben Hogan
[1912 - Ben Hogan, golf champion, born in Stephenville, Texas]

Actor Neville Brand    Actor Neville Brand    Actor Neville Brand
[1920 - Neville Brand, actor, born in Griswold, Iowa]

Singer Don Ho    Singer Don Ho
[1930 - Don Ho (Donald Tai Loy Ho), singer, born in Honolulu, Hawaii]

Songwriter Dan Fogelberg    Singer Dan Fogelberg
[1951 - Dan Fogelberg, singer, songwriter, born in Peoria, Illinois]

Wheels Coming Off

humvee Sacramento Bee 7/21/06 Hummer wheels story humvee

The popularity of oversize vehicles was no surprise; they conjured images of war and aggression, guaranteed to boost the testosterone level of any red-blooded American male (or female). That these overweight, oversized, inappropriate vehicles are without any redeeming social value further appealed to the seemingly insatiable public appetite for pornography. The very impracticality of these behemoths made them even more desirable as symbols of wealth and conspicuous consumption. What if they guzzle mass quantities of gas made from foreign oil? Anyone who can afford to purchase one of these adult toys could afford to fill its oversize belly, even at more than four dollars per gallon of gas. As I drive my armored truck uptown, I say to all you lesser creatures: "Get the hell out of my way, or I will crush you like one of those monster trucks does. monster truck crushing cars My kids are safe inside even as I put yours at risk." Powerful stuff until the wheels fall off in a Carl's Jr. drive-through, exposing the nude emperor behind the wheel.

jeep with lights in the rain Contrast the Hummer with the humble jeep, which became popular with a small segment of the US public following World War II. The jeep was a low cost, no-frills, practical vehicle suitable for off-road and farm use. It was open, tough, simple to maintain, and became a workhorse on many ranches and farms. When you took your jeep to town, the only statement you were making was that you valued its toughness and practicality. The wheels of the Jeep hardly ever fell off, although they were known to take their toll on your knuckles because of those damn hubs. There were no Carl's Jrs. and no drive-throughs back in those days, and obesity had yet to become a national epidemic.

civilian jeep

William's Whimsical Words:

We knew that the wheels were about to come off our culture; we just didn't know when.

BACKto Summer 2011

BACKto Almanack Main Page


Almanack | Journal | Contact | About | Forum | Archives | Glossary | Privacy | Search


Content and text copyright ©2006, Will Henry.
HTML and design copyright ©2002, ABC Internet.
All rights reserved.
No claim made as to animated gifs and still jpeg images.
Last updated on August 12, 2011

ABC Mini-logo